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March 21, 2006
Faux March Madness, Pop Culture Region
Faux March Madness rolls right along with the Pop Culture Region!
#1 Mel Gibson 74, #16 Tom Cruise 63. The Hollywood heavyweights are apparently both crazy, but Mel has the good fortune of being crazy for Jesus, which is a little more acceptable than being crazy for L. Ron Hubbard.
#15 Richard Branson 71, #2 Donald Trump 66. The Donald falls flat because he is an arrogant bastard, and may have well shot the ball into his own bet when he said he would date his own daughter if she wasn't his actual daughter. Branson, however, is one cool cat. I'd much rather have my billionaire rolling around in hot air balloons than spewing hot air.
#3 Paris Hilton 73, #14 Tara Reid 70. Both of these girls can be train wrecks, but no matter what idiotic thing she does or says, at least she has millions of dollars to fall back on. However, if Tara keeps spending her American Pie money on booze and other stuff, she's gonna wind up in Playboy sooner rather than later.
#4 Steve McQueen 88, #13 James Garner 71. Okay, I love James Garner. He's done some good flicks. But Steve McQueen rocks the joint. Whatever I said about Harrison Ford yesterday applies to Steve McQueen, but tripled.
#5 Carson Daly 66, #12 Jimmy Kimmel 62. Both their late night shows sucked, but The Man Show and TRL were both interesting during their time. It's no secret I think The Man Show is stupid, though. Plus, because I always fall asleep with NBC on the TV, Carson is subconsciously talking to me. Carson squeaks by.
#6 Ellen DeGeneres 72, #11 Martha Stewart 65. Martha is THE domestic diva, but Ellen DeGeneres is possibly one of the funniest people on TV. I am always in need of laughs more than I am in need of knowledge of how to peel an orange into a cool shape. Or something.
#10 Johnny Cash 68, #7 Ray Charles 59. Three words: It's Johnny Cash! Both had long and magnificent careers, and both could be pretty bad-ass. JC just has that extra edge that allows him to sneak by Ray Charles.
#9 Jason Voorhees 72, #8 Michael Myers 69. Horror flick mainstays do battle to the end, but Jason wins because nifty hockey mask scarred a generation of moviegoers. Myers, on the other hand, was just loony. (But I wouldn't wanna mess with either of 'em!)
So, for the next round, we have these exciting matchups:
#1 Mel Gibson vs. #9 Jason Voorhees.
#10 Johnny Cash vs. #15 Richard Branson.
#4 Steve McQueen vs. #5 Carson Daly.
#3 Paris Hilton vs. #6 Ellen DeGeneres.
Woah, it's getting crazy now! Check back tomorrow for the results of the Miscellaneous Region!
Posted by oz115 at March 21, 2006 11:51 AM