« I'm a mushroom cloud layin motherfucker | Main | Chicago region, second round »
March 23, 2006
History Region, Second Round
Check it out, yo. It's the results from the second round of the History Region. Who will advance to the Swell Sixteen? Let's find out!
#1 Andrew Jackson 78, #9 Werner von Braun 65. Make no bones about it, AJ knows how to get stuff done. He casts aside the rocket scientist's meager challenge, sending him on his very own trail of tears. Need I mention the assassination attempt again?
#7 Queen Elizabeth 70, #2 Susan B. Anthony 64. Down goes the 2 seed! Queen E (the first, mind you), thumps Susan B. because she managed to rule England for decades while fending off numerous plots to remove a woman queen. As for Susan B., sure she started the whole women's suffrage movement, but it's not like they wouldn't have done that anyway!
#6 Blackbeard 78, #3 Ferdinand Magellan 77. Whoah, Blackbeard pulls out the narrow victory! Blackbeard wins because he is far more resilient than Ferdinand. Magellan conked out halfway through is voyage around the world, but Blackbeard wreaked havoc for years before he was finally felled by 5 bullets and 20 stab wounds. Yikes!
#4 Clarence Darrow 65, #5 Henry Clay 61. There ain't much one can say about this one. Henry Clay had some cajones, standing up for many unpopular stances in his day. But damn, Darrow would defend Satan if he asked him to.
So thus, the Swell Sixteen from the History Region will be narrowed down to the Esteemed Eight next time around! The match-ups for next round are:
#1 Andrew Jackson vs. #4 Clarence Darrow
#6 Blackbeard vs. #6 Queen Elizabeth
Check back tomorrow for more exciting results!
Posted by oz115 at March 23, 2006 06:12 PM