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April 21, 2006
The Penultimate Four results
Can't you feel the anticipation? Who will advance to the Faux March Madness final game? Let's find out!
Steve McQueen v. Winston Churchill: Man oh man, is this one tough! McQueen and Churchill both loved a good smoke, but Churchill's habit didn't knock him off like McQueen's did. Churchill lived to be 90, but McQueen checked out at age 50. Churchill, of course, also had an acerbic wit. Supposedly, when Lady Nancy Astor told Churchill that if she was her husband, he'd poison his tea, Churchill said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it." That is a world-class snap right there. McQueen has a rejoinder, however: "When a horse learns to buy martinis, I'll learn to like horses."
Churchill accomplished quite a bit in his life, but dammit, he is not "The King of Cool."
Final score: Steve McQueen 67, Winston Churchill 60.
Queen Elizabeth v. Walter Payton. Payton has a good run, but it has to end here. Sure, Payton is the hero to the entire city of Chicago, but one has to wonder what the world would be like if Queen Elizabeth hadn't been around to smooth things over. I mean, shoot, there's that whole Spanish Armada thing, for example. Walter Payton just can't go any further!
Final score: Queen Elizabeth 73, Walter Payton 69.
So there you have it: the final matchup will pit Steve McQueen v. Queen Elizabeth. Who is going to win this one? The world wonders!
Posted by oz115 at April 21, 2006 07:57 PM
Comments
I can't believe payton lost to a chick... The only thing making me not kill you (you're sitting next to me right now) is that I know she will be rolled up and smoked by Steve Mcqueen. R.I.P. Walter, you will be avenged.
Posted by: G at April 22, 2006 02:59 PM
Gotta be McQueen. Churchill never could have pulled off the car chase scene in "Bullitt", and I doubt QE I could have either. Plus McQueen gets bonus points for starring in the film adaptation of a great Jim Thompson pulp novel, "The Getaway." McQueen was just flat-out cool.
Posted by: Pete at April 24, 2006 08:32 AM