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January 10, 2009
Are you smarter than Marshawn Lynch?
As you can see, according to an advertisement on the ESPN.com Buffalo Bills page, Marshawn Lynch has an IQ of 124.
Before you consider this as gospel, here is some other evidence. First, according to this page, Marshawn scored a 14 out of 50 on the Wonderlic test. The average person scored 24.
Think standardized tests are a joke? Here is a typical entry from Marshawn's blog:
yb i been thinkin these pass couple days bout dis chargers game cumming up dis weekend. im ready 2 hit dat field fast. i ben practicing hard beastin it out looking 4ward to trent pullin thru gettin bac active. we "da bills" took ah loss n arizona lookin pass dat getting ready 4 da next. lovin da fan attitude they holdin us down wining or losing and dats whats up!... feels good 2 be back n da yard again... holla bac and talk to yah boi.... gone fast like ah nass car. beaasssst mooooode!
What in the hell? Now, I don't think it's fair to equate poor grammatical skills (God I hope I don't misspell something in this entry) with lower intelligence, but it sure doesn't help. This chart suggests an IQ of 124 is significantly above-average. Yet I somehow don't think many people with an IQ of 124 write like this, even if it's in a blog entry or a text message. Show some dignity!
So, is Marshawn a genius in disguise? He's making millions of dollars from playing professional football, so he's definitely smart in that regards. Curious about whether this advertiser gave Marshawn an IQ test, I followed the link. The first question on their IQ test was, "How many sides are there to a pentagon?" The next was "How many standard time zones are there in the world?" I picked 24 as the answer, which would make sense, but I am 99% certain this is wrong. As you can see on this map, there are plenty of areas where the local time is one-half hour off Greenwich Mean Time, meaning there are more than 24 time zones. Never mind that god damn China messes the whole thing up by keeping the whole country on one standard time. Fucking communists.
I had had pretty much enough of the test at this point, so I left. It wasn't even an IQ test; more like a trivia contest.
Anyway, Marshawn, if you're reading, please tell Turk Schonert to run the damn ball more!
entry no. 1275
Posted at January 10, 2009 05:26 PM