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May 17, 2010
Whole lot of shake-in goin on
The Biggest Milkshake Ever, originally uploaded by Aggtastic.
I just learned a very strange thing about competitive eating. This all started when a certain desperado came into Crown Candy Kitchen, a heretofore unknown to me establishment in St. Louis. Apparently this mystery man took an eating challenge - 7 malts in 30 minutes. He vanquished the confections with ease. [Personally, the prospect of all that brain freeze is more than enough to turn me off.]
When it came time for the champion to reveal his name, things took a strange turn:
The man told Andy Karandzieff, the co-owner of Crown Candy, that his name was Kevin Ross, of San Bernardino, California.
However, the blogosphere, specifically the website Punching Kitty, says that is not the case, and that's where this story takes a weirder turn; weirder than a man sucking down more than a gallon of liquid in a few minutes.
Kevin Ross is a champion eater, one of a select group of people who eat dozens of hot dogs or other foods for prize money.
Now, it turns out the "Kevin Ross" from the Crown Candy incident is not the same man. Instead, bloggers say the man who was in Crown Candy sucking down the malts was Ben Monson, another famous eater, who is actually higher ranked in competitive eating circles than Ross.
So why would this guy lie about his identity, when anyone who quaffed 7 milkshakes in a half hour would want to brag to the whole world?
Bloggers say it's all about competitive eating and arcane rules that limit heavy eating to actual contests, not freelancing.
That's kind of an interesting rule. Competitive eaters aren't supposed to put on displays outside the eating circuit? I presume this is because the competitive eating administrators don't want to devalue their competition by having eaters giving free exhibitions.
However, eating isn't exactly like other sports. For example, it's fairly easy to tell Usain Bolt not to race people down at the local track. Or to tell Tiger Woods not to engage in putting contests at the miniature golf course. But it's eating! People have to do it every day.
I imagine these meetings go something like this: "Okay Bob, please, go ahead and eat. But for God's sake, limit yourself to 5 hamburgers, 25 chicken wings, and a quart of clam chowder!"
Then Bob says, "But sir! What if I want a gallon of Hagen Dasz for dessert? I never should have gotten into competitive eating! It's true, never do for money what you would gladly do for free. Woe is me!"
Boss: "Allright, you can eat the Hagen Dasz. Throw in a package of Fudge Rounds while you're at it. Just don't let anyone see you."
"Gee thanks, Mister!"
By the way, whoever wrote the description of Fudge Rounds in Wikipedia is a genius. He's managed to make them sound as unappetizing as possible:
They are made by taking two smaller chewy chocolate cakes, and gluing them together with a light brown fudge-creme.
Who wants seconds!?
entry no. 1456
Posted at May 17, 2010 04:52 PM